Tear-shedding stones
"...In life, there's gonna be times when you're feeling low and in your mind insecurity seems to take control. We start to look outside ourselves for acceptance and approval. We keep forgettin' that the one things we should know is...Don't be scared to fly alone, find a path that is your own. Love will open every door, it's in your hands, the world is yours. Don't hold back and always know, all the answers will unfold. What are you waiting for? Spread your wings and soar..." - Soar by Christina Aguilera
I hate what’s happening to me right now. Why in the world am I this way? I cut one class again today and we had a quiz. The person I know wouldn’t do that. She’ll be very adamant in not cutting that class and would just cut another day, but this person now has changed, very much. Has my resolve weakened that much? I have no motivation to study; that “push” is gone. It’s as if I don’t care anymore. And that, frankly, is scary.
I also hate what the Quezon city government has done: tricycle ban in Katipunan. I’m sorry, but what in the world were they thinking? Oh sure it’s for the safety of the people, but hello! It’s not always the case of these trike drivers. Most of the time, the accidents are caused by speeding drivers who are either under the influence of alcohol or drugs, and mostly happens at night or before dawn. It is seldom caused by these tricycle drivers. I admit that they are scary sometimes especially when they try to squeeze in between an impossible space, but think about how inconvenient it is for the students to travel! For students living in the Katipunan area, they have to take one or two trikes in order to get to their destination! It just makes my blood boil!
I’m supposed to be doing my SA paper right now, or better yet, I’m supposed to be done with it, if not by today but maybe a few days ago. But no! This has been procrastination to the fullest. It was given a month ago, and I have waited until this moment to answer it. I am so stupid! But what’s the use of constantly berating myself when I don’t do anything about it? Right, it has no use at all. It’s like what we discussed in Psychology today that when punishment is not administered constantly, it will have no or little effect.
Nothing like the music of Christina Aguilera to raise my spirits. She may not dress appropriately, but at least she has guts. I love her songs, and it keeps my slipping confidence and self-esteem up.
We had this interesting lecture in Theo class about love. There were some things I agreed on, and some that I don’t.
I don’t like being told what to do, and I don’t like being used, but stupid me, I allow myself to, and I will continue to be until someone whacks me in the head so hard that my brains would be rearranged, and I’ll be able to think straight (<--run-on sentence *shrugs*). Of course I can’t escape from my parents who will tell me what to do sometimes, and I can’t escape from their disappointing lectures. I admit, as much as it’s hard to do and as much as I do try to deny it, that I was at fault at that time. Thinking rationally right now, they were being the concerned parents that they are. Of course, that doesn’t mean that I’ll have to agree to it; I’ll be my stubborn self and give them a bit of a hard time. They expect something from me and I expect them to act in some way too, but like what was said, these expectations are not verbalized; this causes a problem in any kind of relationship, whether they are about family, friends or other loved ones. It can’t be helped to have expectations. That is normal and we aren’t God who is able to love without being loved in return and continues to love despite all the expectations that seem to bar its way. Hold on, I better stop here. Theo class is slowly taking its effect. I don’t want to have a blog full of it. I saw a fellow AtSCAN’s blog filled with topics from his Theo class. But, as boring as the class is, the subject is not.
What is complicated with a stone is that when broken, it has no way of repairing itself. It is so hard that the molecules are too compact to establish their bond with the broken pieces. How about a snail? The shell seems to be able to protect its occupant, but when something heavy falls on it, it breaks. Does it seem strong now? No. That’s why they evolve, and the next one is able to produce a shell stronger than the previous one. To build a wall around it that would certainly last longer.
I’ll snooze for a while and do my paper when I wake up. Ciao ciao!
I also hate what the Quezon city government has done: tricycle ban in Katipunan. I’m sorry, but what in the world were they thinking? Oh sure it’s for the safety of the people, but hello! It’s not always the case of these trike drivers. Most of the time, the accidents are caused by speeding drivers who are either under the influence of alcohol or drugs, and mostly happens at night or before dawn. It is seldom caused by these tricycle drivers. I admit that they are scary sometimes especially when they try to squeeze in between an impossible space, but think about how inconvenient it is for the students to travel! For students living in the Katipunan area, they have to take one or two trikes in order to get to their destination! It just makes my blood boil!
I’m supposed to be doing my SA paper right now, or better yet, I’m supposed to be done with it, if not by today but maybe a few days ago. But no! This has been procrastination to the fullest. It was given a month ago, and I have waited until this moment to answer it. I am so stupid! But what’s the use of constantly berating myself when I don’t do anything about it? Right, it has no use at all. It’s like what we discussed in Psychology today that when punishment is not administered constantly, it will have no or little effect.
Nothing like the music of Christina Aguilera to raise my spirits. She may not dress appropriately, but at least she has guts. I love her songs, and it keeps my slipping confidence and self-esteem up.
We had this interesting lecture in Theo class about love. There were some things I agreed on, and some that I don’t.
I don’t like being told what to do, and I don’t like being used, but stupid me, I allow myself to, and I will continue to be until someone whacks me in the head so hard that my brains would be rearranged, and I’ll be able to think straight (<--run-on sentence *shrugs*). Of course I can’t escape from my parents who will tell me what to do sometimes, and I can’t escape from their disappointing lectures. I admit, as much as it’s hard to do and as much as I do try to deny it, that I was at fault at that time. Thinking rationally right now, they were being the concerned parents that they are. Of course, that doesn’t mean that I’ll have to agree to it; I’ll be my stubborn self and give them a bit of a hard time. They expect something from me and I expect them to act in some way too, but like what was said, these expectations are not verbalized; this causes a problem in any kind of relationship, whether they are about family, friends or other loved ones. It can’t be helped to have expectations. That is normal and we aren’t God who is able to love without being loved in return and continues to love despite all the expectations that seem to bar its way. Hold on, I better stop here. Theo class is slowly taking its effect. I don’t want to have a blog full of it. I saw a fellow AtSCAN’s blog filled with topics from his Theo class. But, as boring as the class is, the subject is not.
What is complicated with a stone is that when broken, it has no way of repairing itself. It is so hard that the molecules are too compact to establish their bond with the broken pieces. How about a snail? The shell seems to be able to protect its occupant, but when something heavy falls on it, it breaks. Does it seem strong now? No. That’s why they evolve, and the next one is able to produce a shell stronger than the previous one. To build a wall around it that would certainly last longer.
I’ll snooze for a while and do my paper when I wake up. Ciao ciao!
posted by Chill at
10:24 PM
1 Comments:
i so totally agree!!.. hahahhaa.. no push at all.. complacency is all but too common these days.. mediocrity has become a standard.. grabe!!.. nkakapika!!.. hahaa.. we just chatted, preho taiong ndi pa gmgwa ng paper!.. studying has, unfortunately, lost its "umph" for me.. funny, kc we share the same dilemma.. cutting is an everyday thing for me na.. (maybe not ur case) pro gets? sobrang common and accepted na xa?? prang it's okay to cut anyway! weird!!..
[ay grabe.. it's like i made my own entry na in ur site.. had i noticed i was saying a lot of stuff na, i wouldn't have ended it.. hehehe.. nytes!.. see ya.. :o)]
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